And Then It Comes......

As I'm sitting here tonight, Just finishing up with our child loss support group, I was sitting on the computer, looking at random things. Just like that. It's September 4th 2015. All. Over. Again. I was right there. I was in the room, BENEATH HIS BEDROOM!! How could I not know? Seriously. How could his mommy, the one person in the world, how could I not know? To stop this hell. To stop this dream. It seems so unreal. I have to constantly shake my mind. I feel like I haven't yet settled into this life. Will I ever? How can I? A life without your baby. This little boy... I birthed him. We went into labor on a Monday night.. He had me craving protein all the time. I remember telling my in laws

Eternity...

I want to talk about "religion" for a moment. Now, I know you're probably thinking, "My God Woman! I don't care what religion you are!" But I'm not going to go there. I'm not saying you're right or wrong. It's really not about religion at all. I'm telling my story. My viewpoint. Before Bo passed away, We would sometimes go to church. We would sometimes go maybe every other weekend. Definitely on holidays. With family. And that was normal to us. That was what we did. Everyone did. I thought. I had no idea what a relationship with God felt like. I knew that He was always present in my life. Because somehow, I knew. I would always pray before I would go to sleep. "Now I lay me down to sleep, I